


A Different Perspective

by SpaceAsthmatic



Category: TOLKIEN J. R. R. - Works & Related Fandoms, The Hobbit - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - Post-Battle of Five Armies, Angst and Drama, F/M, Fluff, Friends to Enemies, Grief/Mourning, Implied Kíli/Tauriel, Legolas Greenleaf & Tauriel Friendship, Military, Mirkwood, Not really though, POV Original Female Character, POV Tauriel, Post-Hobbit, Pre-The Hobbit, Secret Relationship, Silvan Elf Prospective, Sort Of, Tauriel Backstory, War, Women in the Military
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-03
Updated: 2020-03-03
Packaged: 2021-02-22 23:43:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 16,708
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23002300
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SpaceAsthmatic/pseuds/SpaceAsthmatic
Summary: An attempt to tell a story from a relatively outside perspective witnessing the events of the hobbit and Tauriels actions throughout and several centuries before. While also seeing snippets of the world through Tauriels eyes through the same time.
Relationships: Legolas Greenleaf & Original Character(s), Legolas Greenleaf & Original Female Character(s), Legolas Greenleaf & Tauriel, Legolas Greenleaf & Thranduil, Legolas Greenleaf & Thranduil & Original Female Character(s), Legolas Greenleaf/Original Female Elf Character(s), Tauriel (Hobbit Movies) & Thranduil (Tolkien)
Comments: 7
Kudos: 35





	A Different Perspective

**Thank you so much for coming!**

**This was supposed to be a little 4000 word thing from a prompt on tumblr but instead it turned into this 40 page monstrosity in a little over a week.**

**There is a section in the middle that just reference a scene in the movie aka “** Scene where Tauriel….”  **this was done on purpose, it was not a note for me to go back and write that part. I wanted to give you guys room to fit and interrupt that scene as you wish because I thought it would be fun and exciting for you guys to see how you weave them together!**

**There’s only one of these though so don’t worry.**

**AHHHHHHH!!! Okay. I’m ready.**

**I hope you enjoy!**

  
  


**0.0..0.0**

“For reasons unbeknownst to me, you have decided that you want to be part of my basic patrol training program.” Lord Ferdan wandered leisurely up and down their lines of reqruites in his way that still managed to almost look like marching, “My condolences.” 

There was a ripple of laughter from the fenceline behind the weapons master where six of the captains who had already long since graduated both of Lord Ferdan’s elite patrol and captains training programs sat. Five out of the six had served several years on the Amrath, three out of the five had done it as consistently as allowed for centuries. 

Legolas, Avaleina, and Farlen. 

There was no higher honor than being allowed to serve on the Amrath, to face the worst of the worst to be found in this forest. To be sent on missions or errands so important that King Thranduil could choose nobody else. To walk amongst the forest so well trained and aware that you might as well have been considered and synonym for Mandos. 

Tauriel wondered what it was like. Not wondered, needed. She needed to know what it was like.

“Not a single one of you is going to have a good time, I assure you that. You are going to ache like you have never ached before, and your body will probably feel like it's dying. It's not, I expect to see you on the training field this time every morning. Regardless if somebody has already arrived to teach you or not.” He stopped walking to cast his eyes around at them, “Lucky for you, at least half of you are going to be stuck with me for the next few decades as you continuously fail. Or give up.” 

Everybody standing in front of him tried not to shift, while those on the fence line seemed on the verge of giggles. “Not only to you have to impress me to be released from this waking nightmare you have willingly joined, you have to impress this pack of barely useful idiots as well. There in charge of you as much as I am.” 

“Lastly,” Ferdan said coming to a stop in the center of the line, three captains on either side of him on the fence, “You will do as you are told, when you’re told. If Eru himself comes and tells you to turn right, and I say turn left, you had better go left.” 

“Go run twelve miles.” 

**0.0.0.0.0.0.0**

“I’m really glad you decided to come, Ada told me that you had been talking about going up the mountainside with a few friends instead to just watch the celebration.” Legolas said with his customary unusually natural smile.Tauriel couldn’t help but smile in return, it spread even wider when as the song ended Legolas asked her politely for another dance.

It was not often she actually partook so openly in the festive activities. They mostly made her feel awkward and out of place, sort of like she was acting while the others were just being. 

But Legolas seemed to have noticed this a while ago, and so over the last several few decades had made an effort to try and draw her farther out of her social shell. He was a very difficult person to say no to and so sometimes it worked. 

Legolas made a show of holding his hand out to her again, and so she took it just as dramatically, “I would be honored, my prince.”

It was hard to feel like others were judging you in a bad way when you had the attention of the Bachelor Prince of Greenwood the Great. Even if she knew that Legolas saw her no other way than a friend, others didn’t know. 

Through experience Tauriel knew that his attention would inevitably drift away, as there were many more interesting people that wanted it than her. People with more to notice in the first place than Tauriel had ever possessed. But she would possess it, eventually. She had decided that long ago. 

Yet until that time others would be left assuming there were some great qualities about her that drew Legoals’ attention when it could have been on anyone. For that time she knew that everybody had forgotten she was just another orphan under the legal care of King Thranduil. 

Not necessarily a nobody, but far from a somebody. At least somebody that mattered, anyway.

The dance was halfway through when lots of excited chattering from the table that many of the various elite patrol and archery members had settled at caught Legolas’ eyes. Although he tried valiantly not to show it. 

Tauriel might not have even noticed had she not been waiting for it, perhaps even looking for it. And so she turned to look as well, to see what was more interesting than her this time. 

King Thranduil carried Captain Avaleina in his arms like it was the most natural thing in the world, even with the bandages on the upper part of her right thigh and hip no doubt hiding a some sort of poisoned wound. Tauriel could see a spot of black on the bandage she assumed was venom drainage through the light yellow fabric of her dress. 

Tauriel stopped the dance and Legolas looked at her with something she could almost believe was genuine confusion, “Did I do something wrong?” 

She gave him a gentle push towards the table with what she hoped was a gentle smile, “Go see her, I know it's been many months since you’ve had the chance. You’re stuck here with me much more often.” 

Legolas frowned at her, “I’ve never once been ‘stuck with you’ and before you think or say it, neither has Ada.” 

Tauriel rolled her eyes at him, but still could not help her smile, “Alright, whatever you say. Go see her.” 

He hesitated, “Are you sure?” 

“Positive.” 

Without a glance back Legolas practically sprinted the distance that kept them apart. He slid down to his knees without slowing down, probably getting grass stains on his outfit, and came to a near collision stop at the feet of the chair that Farlen sat in. With Avaleina now having been placed onto his lap. 

The lap which Avaleina nearly seemed to fall out of in her haste to reach down and hug Legolas, who managed to get into a crouching position on the balls of his fast enough to keep her steady enough. At least long enough for his balance and strength to set themselves securely enough for him to pull her off of Farlen and onto him. 

Tauriel turned when Legolas wrapped both arms around her and rested his chin on top of her head when she nestled it into his shoulder. She hated that she could not help but wonder and yearn for that kind of reaction to happen upon her return. 

All it did was make her more determined to make it out of stage one of training and to be a guard, so that she could go on day patrols and prove herself. Then everyone would see her. 

**0.0.0.0.0.0.**

Avaleina waved for the next recrute to do their run, watching closely at their every move. After the first two laps without mistakes, Avaleina looked to see who was next in line, Tauriel. She shook her head slightly in preemptive exasperation, next to her Ferdan laughed and gently bumped her elbow, “Be nice.” 

“She’s going to do it again.” Avaleina just muttered in response. 

Ferdan was mysteriously not nearly as troubled by it as she thought he should have been. Or usually was, to her memory “So? She still does the run by following the rules.” 

“But never how we specifically tell her to do it.” Avaleina pointed out, part of her feeling like this was some sort of weird test for her as well but not really caring. 

“What’s wrong with that?” 

Avaleina waved for Tauriel to start the course. She immediately began adding extra flare and pazazz wherever she could, “Because it isn’t what I told her to do. Who is she showing off for? There is no point or purpose for it, and in fact, its more dangerous doing that out in the forest.” 

Ferdan just raised an eyebrow at her, the one that had never fully grown back since the dragon fire, “If you say so.” 

She scowled at him again before turning back to the others, “I do. She does these things when we take her out on practice patrols too. Ignores doing exactly what I tell her for the way that might look better or make her sound better, I don't know. Buy one day, she is going to ignore the one piece of information that was crucial for her to follow.”

Tauriel was nearly done with the course, by passing two of the branches entirely and landing with more force than she had been told to, “I don’t trust somebody that always needs to show off like that, it makes them too rash with decisions. Drunk with the thought of glory, if you will. Always makes me wonder what they're trying to make up for.”

“Do I need to tell you to be nice again?” 

“I am being nice.” Avaleina said, waving for the next person to go, “I didn’t say anything, did I? If she wants to be a show off now, that’s fine, but she cannot be like this forever. The only place in the world that has room for glory is a grave.” 

  
  
  


**0.0.0.0.0.0.0.0.0.0.0.0.0.0**

Tauriel tried her best not to walk in obvious sullen silence at the very end of the patrol, not daring to even look at the back of Avaleina’s head where she walked at lead of the others with her second. 

Avaleina had scarcely said more than a handful of words to anybody since the incident near the river, and following their captains lead neither had anybody else. But that did not mean, however, that Taruiel was any less aware that Avaleina’s displeasure stemmed from her. Nor was she any less aware that they were getting rather close to returning to the stronghold. 

And she already knew that King Thranduil would be aware of the situation. Even if it wasn’t the specifics, he would know that Avaleina wasn’t pleased with how their day patrol had gone. Not for the first time, either, regretfully. 

Tauriel hadn't yet learned how to communicate anything purposefully through any parts of the forest that she could visabbly see, so she didn't know exactly  _ how  _ Thranduil always knew. But she had watched others get in trouble long enough to know that Thranduil - always - knew. 

Especially when it came to patrols. And if Thranduil didn't know, then Lord Ferdan did. Which was even worse. 

The door stood open and waiting for them when they crossed the bridge over the river and into the main entrance of the mountain. They marched as silent as ever into their de-armouring chamber meant to keep the rest of the mountain from becoming contaminated with whatever substances might be lingering on their clothes. 

Legolas lazed with a book in his hands on top of their rows of cupboards that held fresh sets of clothes for them to change into, curiosity of some servant under the perhapes very distant command of Galion. Taruiel couldn’t help but notice that if their prince ever waited for patrols, it was almost always Avaleina’s. 

She had only noticed this because she had never once seen Legolas waiting in here until Tauriel had advanced enough in training to be put on a higher level of patrols to slowly practice her skills. Avalena somehow managed to be her second last captain to rotate through, and when they had returned there had been Legolas waiting patiently.

There he was everyday since the first time when she returned with Avaleina’s patrol as long as he was home and physically well enough to be there. Sometimes even when he wasn't well enough. She hadn’t mentioned it to any of the others, because none of them seemed surprised by this turn of events in the slightest. 

Perks of being the prince’s best friend, Tauriel supposed. She had heard many stories throughout her life about how close the two had been since they were young, it was just that Avaleina had not been around very often since Tauriel had come to live under Thranduil's care.

Legolas didn’t even glance up once from the words on the page as Avaleina stormed behind the curtain to change, each step she took bouncing off the walls with her continued agitation. Only then did he note his page and carefully snap it shut, turning his head so that he could look at Tauriel with a good natured smile, “What have you done now?” 

“Kill three Wargs.” Tauriel answered. 

“Left her post without permission, telling nobody.” Tern corrected, coming out from behind his own curtain and tossing the dirty clothes into a basket, “It did look pretty cool though.”

“It would have taken too long to respond if I waited to report them and wait back for a reply on what to do about the situation. We were supposed to be intercepting a message, and it could have been on those wargs and they would have been long gone if I hadn’t acted.” 

Another curtain slid open and Avaleina emerged, tossing her own dirty clothes into the bask to be washed with a solid sound, “And it would have taken us too long to realize that you had been captured to do anything about it, had it been any more than three wargs.” 

Legolas hopped down from the tops of their cupboards and stood next to Avaleina while she grabbed a few personal items from hers. Which hardly ever included many things, but sometimes there was a ring inside that seemed to hardly ever be the same one. Curiously though, Tauriel had never seen Avaleina take off a ring to store there before patrols and Avaleina always wore a simple ring on the middle finger of her left hand even on patrols. Which is where she would always add the new ring too. 

Yet aside from the brief time Tauriel saw her wearing two rings in the changing room, there was only ever one on her finger. 

A new ring seemed to be waiting for her and Avaleina slid it onto her hand atop the first one with an incredibly brief softently of expression before finishing her scolding, "If you want to get yourself killed stupidly, then by all means go ahead I cannot stop you. You've proven that. But you getting captured puts our entire kingdom at risk, and that, I will put a stop to."

Her retort was irritatingly similar to Avaleina’s previous verbalized displeasure from before, and so Tauriel found herself saying without much of a warning to other parts of her brain, “Alright, I get it, I do. I don’t need to keep hearing it; so stop repeating it.” 

She decided that it was perhaps the worst thing she could have said by the wince on Legolas’ face, even though he stood behind Avaleina and therefore could not have possibly seen her expression. Tauriel wished she couldn't see Avaleina’s expression either. 

The other patrol members suddenly found their shoes, clothes, cuticles, the wall, and literally anything else they could look at far more interesting than the confrontation happening in the middle of the room. Those finished changing behind the curtains remained there. 

For the six longest seconds of Tauriel's life Avaleina turned a silent and coldly critical expression to her, and then she replied with a scoff. “Apparently you don’t, because I seem to keep having to tell you the same things over and over again. Maybe listen next time for once, or write it down, because I can guarantee that I am even more tired of saying it than you are of hearing it.”

Taruriel found herself stunned and lost for words. Well, not lost of words, but lost for one’s that she could use to reply with at this moment without making the entire situation worse. The pressure from Avaleina’s stare could have left bruises on her skin when she said, “And I’m especially tired of dealing with it.” 

Without another word she stalked from the room while the other patrol members attempted in vain to stifle their laughter. One of them coughed, ‘deserved it’ under their breath and other ‘had it coming’, Tauriel wasn’t entirely sure who. She wasn’t sure she wanted to. 

Legolas made to follow Avaleina out in a much more measured and relaxed manner, stopping momentarily to pat Tauriel on the shoulder in sympathy, “A small bit of advice; Ava’s not somebody who's bad side you want to even see a glimpse of and she’s certainly not somebody who you want to get into petty arguments with. It will never end in your favor, trust me.” 

He went to walk out but paused and took another step or two back, "Especially if you're an equal participant. Remember, if you pick your battles, then you're going to fight them." 

With one last pleasant pat onto her shoulder, he followed Avaleina out untroubled. 

“In case Legolas wasn't quite clear enough,” Tern said, winking at her on the way towards the door apparently completely unfazed by Avaleina’s mood, “I’ve seen even Galion run from her on occasion. And if Galion is running, that means that you should also be running.” 

**0.0.0.0.0.0.**

Tauriel walked down the hallway with the rejection form in her hand, crumpled. Fist still balled around it when she used it to knock upon Thranduil’s office door. Ears probably as red as her temper felt. 

“Enter.” The King's voice said from inside, and Tauriel stepped inside ready to express her displeasure and exasperation with the rejection she once again received from joining a more elite patrol team. 

Shocked and unpleased when she found Lord Ferdan, Prince Legolas and Captains Farlen and Avaleina in the room already. She hadn't realized they hadn't finished evaluating the rest of the military personnel requesting permissions to a higher grade. 

Lord Ferdan sat in a chair by the fire, Farlen in a chair across from the kings desk, Legolas on the windowsill next to the open window, and Avaleina sitting cross legged on the samke desk that King Thranduil sat behind. 

The door clicked shut behind her in the silent room. 

“Yes?” King Thranduil asked, four other sets of eyes turning to her. 

Tauriel attempted to ready herself for the conversation without visibly appearing like she was, “I came to ask why I was rejected from leaving the guard and joining a patrol.” 

“Why do you think you were?” Lord Ferdan asked, in his customary strict voice. Tauriel often wondered if he had any other tone than that, if he did, she had never heard it. 

Tauriel’s eyes came to rest upon Avaleina as she said, “Bad impressions and stubborn opinions, perhapes, my lord.” 

“You can say my name, if I am the one you mean.” Avaleina said, “It will not turn you to stone.” 

“I apologize, Captain Avaleina. I had not realized that looking at someone meant that what I was saying meant it was for them, specifically.” Tauriel had to resist the urge to cross her arms. 

“It doesn’t.” Avaleina assured her. “However, considering I am the reason you got rejected again I figured you might have been intelligent enough to figure that out, and since you claim to have all of this unwaverable confidence I thought you might take the open opportunity to own up to the accusation. My apologies to you, Tauriel, for the assumption.” 

Before anybody else could reply, Avaleina continued, “I must admit, I’m disappointed that you went directly to the king about your appeal. Instead of any of your Captains,” with an indication to Ferdan she added, “Or your weapons master.” 

Tauriel couldn’t help but feel a bit betrayed by the fact that Thranduil did nothing for her defense other than lightly tap Avaleina’s knee in what might have been a silent reprimanded. Avaleina looked to her king with an unremorseful expression, and remained sitting atop his desk with perfect comfort and leisure. 

The air seemed thick enough that the crackle from the fire might have set it all on fire.

Lord Ferdan cut in before the fire could, “You have not answered my question.” 

Tauriel didn’t have to think about the reply, because the thoughts had been circling her head the entire walk to King Thranduil's office, “I don’t know the answer to the question. I have the passions, I have the drive, I have the talent to do this. I have what it takes to make a difference. I don’t understand why I’m not good enough. Perhaps Captain Avaleina can explain it to me, unless she’s still too tired to.” 

Tauriel couldn’t help but hate how casual and unbothered by this entire exchange Avaleina seemed to be, “You have the passion and a drive, but it's directionless, fleeting. Hopping from one injustice in the world to another with rapid wanting, not understanding what it takes to get there and maintain it. A directionless person cannot lead others, especially not in a directionless world and a directionless war.” 

“As for your talents,” Lord Ferdan said, breaking his uncharacteristic silence, “Nobody here has tried to deny or discredit the fact that you are talented. Your physical skills are not what has been brought into question.”

Again Avaleina began speaking, “I hope that one day you will grow to be talented in all the ways we need for a patrol member, and especially the captain of the patrol. But right now you don’t yet, and your talents with no control is just dangerous.” 

Tauriel tried her best to hold her temper in, and it must have showed on her face because Thranduil said, “You may speak freely without fear, use your words as you wish. If you came here to discuss your results, then by all means we may discuss them. I warn you to be aware, however, that others may speak with the same candor.” 

After a few seconds of thoughts, Tauriel spoke to the room, “I would find it helpful if Captain Avaleina would be more specific with what aspects of myself she has brought into question rather that poetry. I grow tired of vague reprimands if this is going to keep impeding my life and my success.” 

Thranduil leaned forward in his chair a bit so that he could lay a restraining hand on Avaleina’s arm, keeping her from talking. Early in this same conversation Tauriel had felt a little betrayed by Thranduil's lack of intervention, but now that he did intervene it felt like an insult. Like he was telling the others that he already knew Avaleina had won. 

“Are you certain you wish to phrase it like that?” Thranduil asked Tauriel, and she could feel the burn of everyone’s eyes. Wondering if she was just going to roll over and play dead at her Kings feet.

Unlikely. 

She knew it was a risk to engage Avaleina so specifically, but if her captain intended to be so forward with her in claiming the blame for Tauriel's inability to move up in the ranks. Well, then she intended to be just as forward with her, “Yes, I’m certain. You said that I was to speak freely, and that is what my free mind wishes to say.”

“As you wish,” King Thranduil said as he eased back in his chair and replaced his hand to the armrest, while Farlen seemed to almost lean forward in anticipation.

Avaleina began speaking the very second his hand touched the leather, “I brought into question your lack of ability to ignore the immediate gratification of heartfelt decisions in favor of those that are logical and in the best interest of everyone around you. The best interest of your king and your kingdom. I brought into question your stubborn refusal to listen to the orders of your superiors, and to remember your training.”

“I still don’t understand how my actions have acted against-” 

Captain Avaleina cut her off, “Was the immediate gratification of being able to say you were the one to kill those wargs enough to satisfy the risks that might have come with it? Enough to satisfy the pain you would have felt if it were a trap, or the heartbreak if it was just a distraction to remove you from your post and attack the rest of your patrol? Was having the blood of the wargs on your hands worth having the blood of my patrol, too?”

Tauriel forced herself to bite back her first three responses, “We were ordered to intercept any messages-” 

“No!” Avaleina interrupted again, voice raising noticeably, “No, I was told to intercept any messages. You were told to sit in that tree, and keep watch. You were told to. Stay. There.”

Getting off the desk, Avaleina approached Tauriel in measured strides. Abstractly, she was aware that she was taller than Avaleina by no small degree, but that thought never seemed to matter when her captain got too close when in an ill mood. 

Avaleina stopped a little closer than Tauriel might have liked, “If that isn't specific enough for you: I’m tired of your rash actions putting my warriors and my friends in danger. Your heart is large, deep, and wants nothing more in this world than to do good, Tauriel. I am not saying that is a negative trait about you. But it can be when you live in this forest, and your heart seems to rule your head more often than not, even while you try to convince others you are ready to lead others to do these things alongside you.” 

All eyes were on Tauriel, a mental clock began ticking in her mind. A countdown until a non-response would be a surrender to this argumentative discussion. “Are you attempting to tell me that I must be heartless in order to lead or to succeed? Not all of us can be like you.” 

Avaleina remained nearly entirely unresponsive to these words, which was perhaps the most frustrating thing about her in general, her continued refusal to outwardly respond to things. In contrast, however, Tauriel couldn’t help but notice a dramatic reddening of Legolas' ears at her comment. 

Avaleina said, “Nobody can be like anybody else. No creature can live without a heart. You can feel things without acting on them, you can have emotions without being ruled by them. As far as I’m concerned, this entire conversation is an example of why you aren't ready yet.” 

Taking a small step back Avaleina spread her arms out openly, "How about me, Tauriel? What aspects of myself both as your captain and fellow warrior do you find unworthy of you?" 

"I never once said that you were unworthy," Tauriel said firmly, determined not to let words be put into her mouth in front of an audience. 

"Then do you think I'm stupid? Do you think I'm clumsy or untalented? Do you think that Lord Ferdan and King Thranduil have poor judgement to allow me as a Captain? Perhaps you also want my position on the Amarth?" Each question was as punctuated as the last, each almost feeling like a physical slap in the face. 

Tauriel had trouble holding her tongue this time, "I don't think any of those questions are relevant to the matter at hand." 

"Those questions are exactly the matter at hand." She went from spreading her arms out to letting them drop to the sides, "Why do you refuse to do as you're ordered? What keeps you from trusting others to do their share of the work? I don't understand why you seem to think you're the only capable one around. " 

"I didn't think that anybody else would be able to intercept them in time before the messag--" Tauriel was cut off again. 

"Yes, yes the hypothetical message that they didn’t actually have." Avaleina waved her hand in the air like she was waving the words out the room just to make space for her own. "But why didn't you believe that nobody else would notice? That I would not listen to the trees? That Tern wouldn't have gotten word to the outer perimeter if you had gone up the proper channels?” 

“I thought you had spread us too far apart for me to get word back to anyone before they were gone, you put me too far so that I could not use the tree’s.” Tauriel tried to keep her voice firm, and ignore the glances that Legolas and Farlen were exchanging behind Avaleina’s back. 

“Then why didn’t you at least ask me why I did that? If it really was a mistake, would it not be better for you to point it out to me so that I could fix it?” Avaleina asked, and then continued almost without pause, “I put you there so that you could have the longest sight of vision, you didn’t need to use the tree’s to speak because Tern can do that. Your job was to look ahead, and tell Tern if you saw anything. That's it, that’s all. And you could not even control yourself longer than two hours.” 

Tauriel felt as if no matter what she said she would lose, and so she kept her mouth closed. At least she had gathered information, information to use as she chose to live to fight another day. 

Avaleina scoffed and turned on her heel and went back to King Thranduil's desk and resumed her pose atop it, “As far as I’m concerned this conversation is a perfect example of why you aren't ready. You stormed here full of emotion with no plan and no logical reasoning behind any of it, ready to do, what, exactly?”

“Am I dismissed?” Taurile asked sharply. 

“Yes, of course.” Thranduil answered, with sympathy in his eyes. It always looked the same, no matter if it was when she came to him crying after hardly learning to walk because she fell, to this. The warmth of his sympathy at lead never changed. 

Yet she could still not understand why he refused to spread of this warmth or sympathy to any other parts of his life or the world. 

She tried not to slam the door on her way out, but was fairly certain she hadn't been successful in that particular endeavor. 

**0.0.0.0.0.0.0.0**

“Do it again,” Avaleina said while strolling out to the middle of the training field. 

Many of the others nearby started to sneak glances at what was starting to develop. Confrontations between requites and those training them was not unheard of, but it certainly was not common. Especially when captains on active duty were helping to train them that day. 

Tauriel looked both surprised and slightly insulted, “Why? I did it perfectly.” 

“No,” Avaleina countered, “If you had done it perfectly you would have done it the way we told you to do it.” Tauriel stared at her with open dislike of the situation and instructions, so Avaleina had no issues crossing her arms and staring right back at her, “I said do it again.” 

The other warrior in training that Tauriel had been working with took a few stiff steps to the side of the ring to try and excuse himself from the developing situation. More eyes turned their attention that way. 

“What is wrong with how I did it?” Tauriel asked mildy, but Ava didn’t miss the waiver of her voice that betrayed how annoyed she was already by this situation. 

Avaleina tilted her head to the side at the subtle challenge of her authority, “It was not how I asked you to do it.” 

“But why do I have to do it that way?” 

“Because I told you to.” 

“But why-” 

“Because I told you to!” Avaleina cut her off sternly, several more sparing pairs slowly ended their matches so that they could also turn to the conflict. Avaleina ignored them, usually they would send them back to work with harsh words. But if Tauriel wanted to create such a scene, then they would have a scene. And a scene such as this needed an audience. 

The two elleths stared at each other unblinkingly, Avaleina could feel Tauriel sizing her up and probably trying to gauge her chances of success during this confrontation. Avaleina knew that she would be the winner. One way or another. 

Either Tauriel was going to do as she was told, or she was about to have a very brutal awakening. 

“And if I don’t want to follow the orders from a captain which I do not respect?” 

Mumbls went rippling through the crowd and Avaleina felt herself giving a condescending smirk as she took three steps closer to Tauriel until they were within arms length of one another, “You don’t have to respect me, Tauriel. In fact, I’m positive that I couldn't care less even if I tried about your level of respect for me.” 

She let her words linger in the air for a minute, heavy on everybody's shoulders. Even heavier with the knowledge that she wasn’t done speaking. All the one’s gathered around were shooting somewhat scared glances at one another. 

Avaleina finished her words, tone nearly as flat as a table, “You don't have to respect me, but you do have to obey me. And you will stay here, inside this training ring until you do.” 

“Doing what, exactly?” Tauriel snapped, and Avaleina could tell she was struggling to keep her voice somewhat even.

“Practicing move after move until you do every single one of them exactly as I tell you to. Everything that I tell you to do. You’ll stay in here until next week, if you want to throw that big of a tantrum. But you will do as I say.”

She watched as Tauriel's ears began to glow red with either anger or embarrassment at the dawning realization that she would not win this fight, “Don't believe me? Don’t respect that I’m speaking truths? Let's find out.” 

They stared at each other with growing fire between them, Avaleina almost wished that Tauriel would try something else. Try to leave the ring, walk past her. Something. 

Because then finally Tauriel might learn her lesson. 

Instead, the other elleth performed the move again perfectly, as instructed. 

“Good.” Avaleina said, her green eyes almost glowing with victory as she walked back towards the fenceline, “Do it again.” 

**0.0.0.0.0.0.0.0.0**

“I don't know why she hates me so much!” Tauriel exclaimed, throwing the stick she had been twirling in her hand for the past twenty minutes against the bark of a tree to make her point. Glowering at the elf who walked beside her when she heard him chuckle.

“Avaleina does not hate you,” Thranduil said mildly, “Trust me, if she hated you, she would make your life much more difficult for you than this. Much, much more difficult for you.” 

“That is very comforting, thank you.” Tauriel said dryly, trying to ignore how red her ears still felt since she had been dismissed from Thranduil’s office several hours ago. 

Next to her Thranduil laughed again, “I’m not trying to be comforting.” 

“I’ve noticed.” 

Even so, he put a sympathetic arm around her shoulders, “I wish that I could be comforting in this matter, but sometimes there are lessons that life is determined to teach you. I think that you need to find the one’s that are hidden amongst this situation. And if life isn't determined to teach you these lessons, Avaleina is.” 

They walked like this for several minutes in silent comfort, because even though Thranduil claimed that he was not trying to be comforting, he had never needed to try in the first place. 

“Tauriel,” Thranduil began with the tone that usually meant some tough love was coming, and she braced herself for impact, “You were the one that wanted so badly to be part of the patrols. You knew the training program and selection was intense, you were the one that wanted to attempt to climb the ranks much faster than the average elf. And yet, you are the one who seems to refuse to understand or even listen to the criticisms of a few of your superiors, so that you can make the needed changes.” 

“But its just Avaleina and she’s always been so un-” 

“It is Avaleina and she is your captain and will be treated with the same respect the title bestows upon all others, regardless of your personal feelings about her.” Thranduil interrupted sternly, and Taruel bit back the rest of the sentence she had been brewing. 

She didn’t need to be warned twice in one conversation about insubordination. Not after just being declined advancement. 

Thranduil continued speaking as Trauriel didn’t, “She does not hate you, but she feels as though you have not given her a single reason to trust you, but indeed perhaps several to prove that she cannot.” 

Tauriel felt herself bursting with the words before she knew what they were going to be, “But she can trust me, she’s just being-” 

Thranduil held up the hand that had been around her shoulders for silence, and Tauriel complied, “It does not matter if she can or cannot. It only matters that she feels rather certainly that she cannot, and it’s your job to prove to her that she can trust you. Because the rest of the captain’s trust Avaleina implicitly and will follow her lead on this matter if you do not find a way to correct it.” 

“You trust me though! And Legolas!” Tauriel exclaimed in frustration, “Should that not be enough for her?” 

“I do trust you, without a single doubt.” Thranduil began quickly, and then added more carefully, “But I also trust Avaleina, and she has plenty of first-hand experience with you in the field while I have none. And I cannot allow myself to let a personal bias for you to override her consistent and well supportated feedback.”

Tauriel picked up another stick to begin twirling between her hands again, assuming she looked about as dejected as she felt. 

“I would suggest you start with trying to have civilized conversation about the matter with her and see what she has to say, instead of getting angry, defensive, or stubborn.” 

Tauriel frowned, “But how can I trust that she will listen to me, and take me seriously?” 

Thranduil made a sort of humming sound deep in his throat as he slowly began gliding to the left turn of the upcoming fork the road which would lead them back to the stronghold, “Having trust and faith in your captain is even more important than them having trust and faith in you. If you do not trust them, they cannot count on you to take their commands as law and do as you are told because you will always be second guessing their decisions. Does that sound familiar?”

Tarueil felt her steps slow a bit with the sting of the words, even as Thranduil's voices drifted back slightly since he himself did not slow his steps in the slightest, “Tauriel, talents or no if you cannot find a way to work with your captains then the patrols will have no use for you. Find a solution or keep reusing to, the matter rests in your trustworthy hands.” 

**0.0.0.0.0.0.0.0.0.**

“Did you ever stop to think perhaps you are being too hard on her?” Legolas asked, biting back a small smile at the seething glare Avaleina sent his way. 

From her perch on top of her desk with him sitting in the chair she was taller than him for once, and so was able to look down her nose at him when she replied, “Did you ever stop to think perhaps you are being too easy on her?” 

With a small shrug Leoglas allowed him to smile to crack open his mouth, “Once or twice. You” 

“More like sixteen or seventeen.” Avaleina teased, and then continued in a superior voice, “Not once. Not one single time.” 

“Very sure of yourself this evening, I see.” He teased lightly. 

To which she replied immediately with a scoff, “I’m always sure of myself.” 

“Hmm, this is true.” Legolas said, sliding the chair a little bit closer to the desk, “It’s one of the many things I love about you.” 

“That you love about me sometimes,” Avaleina corrected. 

In response Legolas kissed his newest ring creation that rested on her left hand, not on the right finger to be a proper engagement ring but one finger over. That didn’t to them, “That I almost always love about you, unless it makes my life incredibly inconvenient. Which it has been known to do on occasion.” 

“It’s a good thing I have other qualities that can help make up for it.” She smiled, hooking her foot through one of the chairs arms and pulling it even closer until both her legs were practically resting around his waist and he could have easily laid his head upon her lap. 

“As far as I’m concerned, there is no quality about you that needs compensation from any others,” His voice was almost as soft as his arms when they slid around her waist and pulled her closer to the edge of the desk. 

“You flirt,” Avaleina half heartedly chided. 

Legolas shrugged again, “Perhapes, but it works. I’ve somehow managed to convince the most uniquely phenomenal creature on Aman to marry me, no idea how, but I have.” 

“None?” She asked, her tone light and almost bubbling with laughter. 

He shook his head earnestly, “Not a single one.” 

“Not just a flirt, but a liar as well.” Avaleina said, leaning forward to capture his lips with her own. His arms pulled her tighter until she had slid far enough across the desk to be flush against his chest, while her arms entwined around her neck and one hand slid into the hairs at the base of his head. 

Legolas broke away only long enough for them to take a breath or two and for him to stand up to make it a bit less awkward of an angle before he deepened the kiss. Avaleina couldn't help but gasp slightly at the passion of it before she melted against him, her legs entwining securely around his waist. 

Legolas leaned forward a little bit more as the passion between them grew, and she amount of spaced lessened even more. When it was Avaleina’s turn to break away to get some air, Legolas moved the target of his lips from Avaleina’s to her check, jawline, and to her neck. Her hand that still had a light grip on his hair tightened at the sensation. 

Eventually his affections came to rest at the hollow of her throat, where he placed several adoring and loving kisses. Directly over the scar that had finally convinced him to tell her how he felt. Where the arrow he still saw in half of his nightmares had landed with a solid thud. 

Then there was a purposeful knock on her office door. 

Both of them froze, and then sighed with equal amounts of defeat and disappointment. Legolas leaned back, un-entangling himself slightly from Avaleina’s limbs, “Duty calls, I suppose. Will Ada and I see you for dinner?” 

Leaning forward she gave him one last long lingering kiss, even as another knock came from the other side of the door. Then Legolas stepped back so that she could hop back onto the ground and smooth a few sections of her clothes, “Of course.” 

Legolas kissed her cheek before they were too close to the door and whispered, “Marry me?” 

This was potentially the hundredth time he had asked her, but it never ceased to make his heart stop in its tracks out of pure joy when she said, “Yes, always.” 

When as Legolas opened the door, Ava would be the first to admit she was not expecting it to be Tauriel on the other side. 

**0.0.0.0.0.0.0.0.0.0.**

Tauriel had to admit, when she had come here to speak with Captain Avaleina, she was not expecting Legolas to open the door. For a moment, both of them looked just as surprised as she assumed she looked. 

“I was just on my way out, but should I stay?” Legolas asked openly, rather to any specific party. But with heavy implication that he wanted the answer to be yes. 

Avaleina just leaned against the doorframe and looked at her expectantly, and so Tauriel answered matter of factly, “No.” 

“Alright,” Legolas agreed mildly as he finished his journey out of the room, whistling a tune as he went. For reasons unknown to her, this seemed to make Avaleina smile and almost suppress a laugh. 

Faster that it came the moment was gone from her face and Avaleina stepped aside and swept an arm to indicate that Tauriel should come inside and so she did. Her mind was unable to stop from wondering at one point one got their own office. Without a word Ava sat behind her desk, and so Tauriel sat across from her. 

“Well?” Avaleina asked. 

“I came to ask you something, and I want nothing but your honesty.” Taurield answered, coming out with it as fast as she could before she lost the nerve. “Do you really see so little future for me in the direction in which I seek the travel?” 

Avaleina was silent for a few seconds but judging by her expression she was about to start something that Tauriel likely would not be able to win, and so she took the opportunity to speak again. “Please, no games. Just tell me your straight answer.”

“If I saw little to no future in you, I would have already convinced Ferdan to kick you out of his training. If I only saw the minimum requirement, I would not hardly put my efforts into you. Considering the lengths I’ve gone to try and change your behavior and help you learn, I think you should be flattered.” 

Of all the things Tauriel expected to hear, that was certainly not any of them. All she could manage was a rather hollow, “Oh.” 

Then Avaleina’s eyes hardened a little even if her voice didn't, “But I warn you, even I only have so much time for those who refuse to even acknowledge my efforts. The only reason I have not yet given up on you, is because Legolas has somehow convinced me not to.” 

Leaning forward, Avaleina put both elbow on the table and rested her chin atop her folded hands, “Legolas does not often convince me to do things that I end up to regret, I’ll never let him or you live it down if this is one of those times.” 

“Yes, Captain.” Tauriel said automatically, somehow feeling significantly lighter and more optimistic regardless of Avaleian’s tone. All she needed to know was that the harshness was out of optimism for her future. 

Not sincere attempts to put an abrupt stop to it. 

“Is that all you wanted?” 

“Yes, Captain.” 

“Then goodbye, I have things to do.” 

With a spring in her step Tauriel left the office. 

  
  
  


**0.0.0.0.0..0.0..**

Tauriel walked into Thranduil's office with the letter in hand, finding Legolas sprawled out on the floor in apparent misery and the king tucked neatly behind his desk, “Beorn sent us a bird with a message, my lord.” 

“Beorn?” Legolas and Thranduil asked together. 

She couldn’t help but laugh at them while she nodded, considering how often they did that. Theoretically by accident. Theoretically. They had been doing it nearly once a day since the king had taken Tauriel in near 600 years ago so she found herself reluctant to believe them outright. 

Tauriled came further into the office and placed the letter on Thranduil's desk even as she told him its contents, “He says he has information he needs to share with us, and requests that somebody meet him at the usual spot on the forest edge.” 

Legolas sat up on the rug, hair sticking in a few directions from the static, “I wonder what it is.” 

“Nothing good.” Thranduil sighed, “I can feel it.” 

Not bothering to get up, Legolas walked on his knees over to his father's desk so that he could also look at the map that always sat on his desk with a small pane of class overtop. They contemplated it in silence for a few seconds before Thranduil asked, “Who has taken Tern’s place towards the east while he recovers?” 

“Eloissa.” Legolas answered immediately, “But if you move Farlen from outpost seven to outpost twelve for a day or two, then Rowan can go to outpost fourteen and Avaleina can go and meet him.” 

“I could go and meet him,” Taurile offered, “It would probably only take me a few hours to reach his location and then come back.” 

She couldn’t help but feel hurt at how quickly Thranduil said, “No, thank you. That's alright.”

**0.0.0.0.0.0**

Avaleina stepped out of the forest and into the gentle rain that she had only been able to hear underneath the canopy of the trees. She found Beorn instantly, not by sight but by smell. There were very few creatures that smelled of both wet bear and wet man, quickly accompanied by the smell of wet ponies. 

Twelve ponies, to be exact. Out of habit and instinct alone they all came towards her, expecting her to have food and treats for them as she usually did when visiting their masters house. They seemed disappointed when she laughed and showed them her empty hands, and reluctantly accepted her affection as substitute payment. 

Still scratching one of their chins, she looked up to Beorn with a smile, “I was just pestering Legolas and Farlen to work out a day where we could all come visit you and all of your friends.” 

Beorn grunted in a way she had come to understand as fond agreement, “It has indeed been many moons since we have seen the familiar faces of our Greenwood friends.”

“Though I fear this meeting is not for pleasantries, but for purposes.” Avaleina said, moving her hands to two other ponies fighting for her attention. Beorn did not often come to the woodland realm unless invited to an event or prearranged. Even then, his company this close to the forest was rare. 

“I had a few visitors last night and this morning that I thought your King might be interested in knowing.” Beorn stated, sniffing the air deeply like the smell still lingered in his nose. Perhaps it did. 

“Oh?” She asked, pausing her scratches in surprise until one of her favorite ponies Lilac - Beorn had let her name a few of his foals a few summers ago, Lilac being one of them - pushed forcefully against her hand in protest. “Who? You do not often get visitors, especially ones that you do not know.” 

“No, I do not.” He agreed, “Which is how I prefer it. Then I do not end up with dwarves in my kitchen.” 

“Dwarves?” Avaleina nearly gasped, “Why were there dwarves in your kitchen?” 

“They were hiding, they said. From Azog the Defiler.” 

“Azog?” Already the thoughts in her mind were sent racing, “Why would Azog be out of Dol Guldur? He never leaves his master's side. And why would he be chasing some dwarves?” 

“Not ‘some’ dwarves. One in particular. Thorin Okeansheild. King under the mountain, the lonley mountain. He and his kin were being led by a wizard named Gandalf the Grey, he said he knew of Radagast the Brown.” Beorn grumbled, clearly unsatisfied with this turn of events and the part he had been chosen to play in them. 

“Thorin son of Thrain?” 

“As he said.” 

She didn’t need to have all the pieces to know that she wasn’t going to like the picture it was going to form to be, “Where are they now?” 

“Gandalf sent them down the old Elven gate, with instructions that they were not to stray off the path.” 

Avaleina liked this even less, “Why did he lead them into our forest?” 

“Not into it, to it.” Beorn corrected, “The wizard road off towards the High Fells of Rhudaur, after asking questions about the fortress of Dol Guldur and its master there.” 

Her mind scrambled to find all the pieces of the information in her brain, all the possibilities that could stem from them: Dol Guldur. The High Fells. The Nine. Dwarves. A Dragon. Gandalf, somehow mixed up and meddling with all of them at once. 

Even in his silence, Avaleina could sense Beorn’s own misgivings about the situation. Mostly due to the fact that his ponies had continued to mill around him and bump gently into his legs, one of his hands almost always wrapped inside their hair. “I sense that I will not like what is to come.”

“Nor will I.” Avaleina agreed, chewing on the inside of her lip without noticing, “Thank you for bringing us this news.”

“Run and tell your King, I shall go and prepare in my own way for this coming storm.” 

Before he turned to leave and most likely transform back into a bear, Avaleina held her hand out to him. Palm facing upwards. An old tradition of his people, to signify the following words to be truthful and genuine. Beorn took his two large hands and swallowed hers completely in his grasp, including near half her lower arm. 

“Whatever occurs, Beorn, know that you and all the creatures that reside with you will always have a place within our forest or our halls should you ever need or desire them.” 

He nodded, patted her hands once and then turned and walked away. Avaleina turned also, and ran back into the embrace of the forest and to convey the message to Thranduil 

**0.0.0.0.0.0.**

The entire city trembled with the same energy that all the elves were getting from the forest. Tauriel stood at the entrance of the gate where she often posted herself, trying her best to convince the tree’s to tell her their secrets. 

As usual, they were perfectly content to ignore her. 

It felt big, whatever it was. There were a lot of emotions attached to it, and she had felt several long and frantic communications pass between Avaleina and King Thranduil. 

There was the sound of marching footsteps coming from the staircase to the right of the doorway to the outside world, and Taruiel stepped to the right to make room for them to walk through and also check to see who it was. 

Legolas and most of the common parol marched up to her guard post, and Legolas paused at the lead, “We have to go round up some dwarves, apparently. We’re missing a few members of our patrol, including my second. Would you happen to know any Captains of the Guard who might want to accompany us?” 

It took her mind a few second to wrap around the concept of dwarves in their forest, when all that came to mind was the very few stories Tauriel had managed to coax out of King Thranduil about the fall of Menegroth when she had been younger. 

Nonetheless hearing herself referred to as a captain of the guard still brought a smile to her face even though it had almost been two years since she had been given the title, and even though she still had not been granted access to join a patrol, “Yes, I do happen to know one.” 

“Fantastic.” Legolas said and immediately set out across the bridge and Tauriel found herself falling in step next to him, the others trailing behind. 

**0.0.0.0.0**

Scene where Tauriel gets yelled at by Thranduil for wanting to kill more spiders than she was told to do. Minus the weird ‘Legolas has a crush on you’ inuedndo and also the ‘Lowly silvan elf’ comment…… Just….. None of that. 

**0.0.0.0.0.0.**

They needed to find out what Gandalf was doing, they needed to know if they had lost an ally to the darkness or not. They needed to know if their chances of survival were going to diminish to an even greater extent. 

They needed to know. 

And so hours upon hours the patrol had been waiting, carefully concealed with a mixture of their kings magis, their captains, and their own to keep themselves from becoming detected. Still as could be. 

Even more so than the dead and rotting trees that surrounded them. They had been sent because their king trusted them, and only them with this task. He trusted them to stay and complete it even if the rest of the world burned around them. 

Even as she heard the Dragon’s call and felt the fire burning in her soul. Avaleina forced herself to ignore that, as she was instructed. Thranduil told her that it was not her concern, and so she forced it not to be. She had other concerns. 

She just had to trust that the others would do their part, while they trusted her to do her part. And well, if her people couldn’t do that part then it wouldn’t be long until the fire came to stop Avaleina from doing hers as well. 

So with every breath she forced herself to try and ignore it. Even while taunting words from the dragon echoed in her soul. Her mind. Her heart. 

Maybe that was just Thranduil’s memories touching her mind. Maybe it was an echo of Legolas’ perception, as he listened to the words in person. Maybe it was something far more sinister. 

With a deafening silence, she felt the Dragon fall. Still, she waited. 

What came next was beyond even her wildest guess of the next events. Her oxygen bled out of her lungs and her blood when cold as she felt the other elven rulers coming forward. Felt the power of their rings bouncing off the ground. But crouched in the tree as she was, the same place she had been for the past ten or so hours, they did not see or sense her. 

They practically walked right underneath the tree she and her patrol were spread out through. But Lady Galadriel and Lord Elrond just kept on walking, unknowingly. Directly toward Dol Guldur. 

King Thranduil had ordered them to get as close to Dol Guldur as they dared, for as long as they dared to see if they could investigate why Mithrandir had gone to the fortress himself. Without so much as a whisper of his plans of his passing to the ‘ally’ kingdom that was directly beside it. 

Why he had sent the dwarves one way, while he went another. The idea that Mithrandir had somehow turned against them was naustating, yet Ava could not shake the feeling that was exactly what was happening. Especially as she watched the other rulers make their steady approach towards the evil before her. 

Why else send the dwarves as a distraction, while he slipped into the fortress without being noticed? Why else would Mithrandir come here immediately after returning from the High Fells? 

So far, it all added up to produce a very terrifying picture indeed.

How Avaleina hoped this wasn’t one of the worst ways she could possibly find out that somehow all the other powers of Arda had joined the one that ruled this evil fortress. How she forced herself not to hope that perhaps instead, no matter how unlikely it seemed, that somebody else was going to do something. 

Somebody else was going to help them in this endless fight, so that they would not be standing alone surrounded by so many powerful enemies. . 

But still, she could not let herself hope. She couldn’t.

Avaleina and two other scouts crawled through the branches of the tree’s and closer to the fortress themselves. Leaving the bulk of their small party behind, while they themselves tried to see if they could catch a glimpse or a clue of what might be transpiring above them. 

They were still waiting in the branches when a glowing ball of malevolent energy hurdled across the sky, knocking them down from the branches with the strongest physical touch they had ever felt. 

Around them, dried branches crashed to the ground and rocks slid down any sort of slope. Any natural creature that was unfortunate enough to be nearby went scattering in every single direction there was. 

Everything was rocked solidly in its foundation form the strength of the rippling force. As some of the hatred that had floated from above them lifted once more, Avaleina caught herself daring to hope. 

Hope that things were going to get better. Things were going to change. 

But then they felt the other powerful beings leaving even faster than they had arrived, not even glancing back at the forest as the forces of evil erupted into a rapid frenzy of anger and devastation. Foaming at the mouth with the toxic burning need for revenge. 

The elves could feel the orcs staggering with the choking realization that for the very first time since perhaps they were created, all the choices for these creatures of evil were their own to make. There were no rules to this game anymore, just the one that had been bred into their DNA.

Kill the elves. Kill the good. Snuff out the light. Cleanse the world of their glowing light with their burning one. 

It was as Avaleina realized that the White Council was fleeing back to their safe havens, seemingly caring nothing for the repercussions or effects of any of their actions, that the she decided they got all of their light by leaving other places darker. 

Ava whispered a curse after them, quite enough that her own ears hadn’t even heard them, but it was out in the universe no less that if it had been screamed. She had let part of herself hope that things might get better, she should have expected they would be left worse off.

Then she and her patrol started running as fast as they physically could away from this rabid hate, and then just a little bit faster than that. She had to tell the king. 

**o.o.o...oo.o.**

By the time she arrived at the city of Dale, she could tell that Mitherandir must have already arrived, judging by the malcontent lingering in the air. The forest had told her that he had headed this way with all haste upon Radagast’ horse. 

Harrowed faces of traumatized and wounded humans passed by her in a blur as she crossed the crumbled city towards where she felt the strength and pull of Thranduil's magic. Dozens of elven mouths muttered the same gossip amongst themselves in an attempt of hushed voices, but Avaleina could still hear the name ‘Tauriel’ upon most of their lips. 

Avaleina tried not to frown each time she heard it. 

An injured Tern had hastily recounted her everything she had missed with the dwarves while she had been away on patrol when she had momentarily returned to the stronghold to report to Lord Ferdan. Right before setting off to join the army at the mountain. 

Including Tauriel’s supposed romantic affections for a dwarf, and hypothesised defection from their army and their people. 

Coming upon the king’s tent, the guards stepped aside instantly and allowed her entry. 

Thranduil was in the middle of the conversation and a human who’s name Avaleina’ wanted to say was Bard, one she had recognized from past vistest to laketown. She drew the obvious attention of only the human, even as she casually strolled behind Thranduil’s desk to sift through some of his reports and personal notes. 

She passed over her own hastily scribbled note that had reported the sightings of Galadriel, Elrond, and Saruman followed by the claim made by Radagast that Gandalf had been kidnapped and had called the other’s for aid. 

Avaleina had to close her eyes when bones rattled with the memory of being shaken off the tree by the physical explosion of hatred. 

Thranduil said to the human, “It is nearing dinner, I’m sure it will be served soon and Tilda will be searching for her father's arms. If there happens to be something else I require from you, I shall have somebody send a message.” 

With a small gesture of his hand the guards lowered the tent flaps to keep their words from drifting or determined eavest droppers from reading their lips as the human left. Finally he turned to Avaleina, scrutinizing her wellbeing with a hard glance, “Report.” 

“The fortress is in chaos, their leader has been struck out for the time being. Orcs are clambering over one another for the ranks, but they are still getting themselves organized somehow. I believe they are preparing to make an outright assault against us, the likes of which we have not seen in many centuries.” 

“Worse, more than likely.” Thranduil mused more to himself than anybody else, looking over the map on the table in front of him, “But make an assault where? I fear for the position of the mountain, we cannot let it fall lest we be all but cut off from the outer worlds, yet, I do not know if the Orcs will attack our home. And if so, is it just our home, or also the mountain?”

Avalena nodded thoughtfully, “I have the same fears. On our return from the fortress, we prepared many of our traps so at least we shall have a warning. The patrols have been informed and defenses have been ordered to be redoubleded, all the river crossings have been removed to help stop their movement through the forest should they choose to attack us at home. We sent words to several of our Avari tribe treaty members in warning, I expect they shall prepare themselves to assist should the need arise.” 

“Good, that's good. Thank you.” Thranduil said, still looking at the map, “Legolas has gone to Gundabad to investigate the happenings, see if there are any stirrings.” 

“Gundabad?” Avalena asked, “You believe it is returning to life?” 

“I fear that it's a possibility.” Finally Thranduil looked up from the map, “It would put us in a regrettably vulnerable position I fear.” 

“The army from Dol Guldur we could probably repel, but one from both them and Gundabad?” Avaleina shook her head in dismay at her own question, “And if we were to fall, if they were to take the mountain and our home as their as well, the other Elven realms would not be far behind us. Ring or no.”

Thranduil snorted a mocking laugh and rolled his eyes, “Yes, I am certain Mithrandir will be along soon to plead for my action on their behalf, like they're some sort of vulnerable and innocent bystanders. As if they were not all just in my forest several hours ago.” 

Avaleina didn’t respond to this, she knew that what little faith Thranduil had in the other elven realms had sailed west with Celebrain some time ago. So instead she asked, “Who did he go with?” 

“Tauriel.” Thranduil answered, cutting eye contact with her. 

Avaleina felt her temper rise, “Just Tauriel?” 

“Just Tauriel.” 

She forced her voice not to rise with her body temperature, “The same Tauriel who allegedly spent an entire night engaged in hushed conversations with the dwarf, abandoned her post yet again even after you ordered the border closed to run to laketown without permission?”

Thranduil sighed, “I’m as unhappy about the situation-” 

“With respect, my king, and with the knowledge of your life and past, I still highly doubt that.” Avaleina interrupted bluntly, “Highly, highly, highly doubt that.” 

For a moment it looked as if Thranduil might argue, but he eventually settled for saying, “You’re probably right about that.” 

“I know I am.” 

“Even as such, with Legolas gone, I can trust you as my second?” 

“Always.” Avaleina promised. 

Reaching out with soft hands, Thranduil lightly took either side of her face, “It will be alright, you have to trust me. We have not fallen yet.” 

**0.0.0..0.0.0.0.0.0.0.**

Avaleina lounged in a tree with Farlen, sharing bread and other foods with him as Gandalf's voice drifted up to them from Thranduil’s tent which lay nearby, “Orcs are on the move, these are fighters. Bred for war.” 

Both of them were motionless for a second, until Farlen snorted with laughter. Then Avaleina’s giggles were not far behind that. With slight gasps, Farlen managed to whisper, “Did he forget we have been fighting them for centuries? Somehow? How much pipeweed does he smoke?” 

Avaleina had to cover her mouth to stifle some of the noise. 

Gandalf's voice continued to rise into the night air, “Because we forced him! We forced him to show his hand when the company of Thorin Oakensheild set out to reclaim their homeland.” 

Both of them could almost feel Thranduil roll his eyes at the comment, and they both laughed harder. And Farlen continued his hushed criticism, “Hmmmm, and which wizard I wonder started all of that nonsense?” 

“The dwarves were never meant to reach Erebor, Azog the Defiler was sent to stop them. His master seeks control of the mountain, not just for its riches but for its strategic position.” Gandalf’s voice was louder as he wandered out of the tent to get a better look at the lonely mountain. 

“Ah yes, thank you.” Farlen whispered, even more quietly, “I have never once looked at a map before.” 

“If the fell kingdom of Angmar should rise again, Rivendell, Lorien, the Shire, even Gondor itself will fall.” 

“It's a good thing I didn't make a bet with Thranduil over Gandalf bringing them up.” Avaleina said, putting a few pieces of cheese onto the bread before taking a bite. 

“Rule number one, my friend.” Farlen began, pausing to open his mouth expectantly when Avaleina offered him the last bite. He chewed and swallowed it before continuing, “Never make a bet with King Thranduil.” 

**0.0.0.0.0.0.0.**

Avaleina stood just to the side of the ranks, eyes locked solidly on Thorin and his bow. Vaguely she was aware of conversations happening, but that did not matter to her. Because her job, as Thranduil's second, was to be faster with her bow than the enemy that aimed theirs at her king. 

It was her job to shoot the other off course, just as she had been trained to do. 

“Give us your answer, will you have peace, or war?” She registered Bard ask in a strong voice. 

There was a lingering silence, before Thorin's voice echoes across the stone, “War.”

Like a great, dark, smelly wave Avaleina watched as an army of dwarves began to pour over the hillside. As one single creature, the elves turned their attention and Avaleina came to stand to the right of Thranduil's horse. 

Watching with disgust as the new dwarf threatened to kill them all and water the ground with their blood. 

“Stand your men down, I’ll deal with Ironfoot.” Thranduil said to Bard as he advanced them forward, the same time the dwarves sent their own people on the backs of rams. Avaleina saw the signal and so gave the order for the arrows to fly, staring with wide eyes as the darves sent their own monstrosities back which rendered their arrows to splinters 

She called for her ranks to scatter, but only some managed to make it out in time before they hit the ground. Those too unfortunate to get out of range were sent flying, some of them in pieces. 

Pieces of her heart going with each and every one of them. 

Several others landed in the ranks all around her, each having a near equally devastating effect as the last. 

They fired another round of arrows, which were rendered to splinters. 

Pulling back amongst themselves, they set to preparing for the arrival of the dwarves on goats. Their shields create enough of a distraction that other elves sent countless dwarves falling from arrows, spears, and swords alike. The battle quickly grew fierce and frenzied about them. 

In the back of her mind as another dwarf came right for head her with his axe, Avaleina could remember the stories she had been told about the fall of Menegroth. About the slaughter at the hands of the dwarves. 

She did not intend to allow her king to suffer such heartbreak at the hands of such creatures every again. Swelling with determination she renewed her attacks, increasing the strength and speed in which they struck. The elves around her doing the same. Protecting themselves and their king. 

The only thing that brought a pause to their actions was a great and horrible creaking sound coming from the mountain. Slowly the battle drew slower before it stopped altogether as they all turned wondering eyes to the countryside. Right before massive wearworms crashed through the surface in many places. Rocks and other debris going flying in all directions. 

Avaleina gasped in shock, and turned her head to find Thranduil and gauge his reaction. He seemed to be just as surprised by this turn of events, and creature. They had heard and seen such worms before, but never one’s this size. Not even in their legends. 

A great horn shattered the air and she recognized it as a horn from Dol Guldur and assumed that meant Azong had decided to attack the lonely mountain after all. 

Well, at least it wasn’t their own home. 

With war cries the dwarves charged forward, starving for blood and death. The elves remained still as Avaleina and a few other captains ran to Thranduil, quickly deviasing a suggestion of a battle pan before running back to their stations. 

Word of the command spread swiftly, and their reactions were almost just as fast. They reached the dwarves shield wall and leapt over it with fluid grace, slicing Orc after Orc while the dwarves kept them covered with their own weapons. 

That was the last semblance of order that Avaleina could remember. 

Everything after her feet hit the ground on the other side of the shield was pure chaos. Chaos, fear, and death. 

So much death. 

**0.0.0.0.0.**

Avaleina knelt beside a beautiful eternally young face, one she had helped to train herself. The sound of his laughter rang in her ears as she stared at his mouth while it bubbled up with blood. Her own hands came away from his neck slick with the blood that had killed him when it left. Her knife sliding out of his skin without resistance. 

It was a more peaceful death than the one he had been having, and she could already feel the way Mandow lingered at her right shoulder waiting for him. 

She heard the horn to signal their retreat, but only moved numbly from one elf struggling to enter the halls to another. Helping them along to their peace once she had ensured there could be no saving them. 

It was the absolute and very least she could do for them, these poor souls she loved so much. Who deserved better. Who deserved to live. 

**0.0.0.0.0.**

Thranduil was surprised to find Tauriel in front of him, but even more surprised when her almost hysterical voice shouted, “No! You will not run away! Not this time!”

“Get out of my way.” Thranduil growled, taking a menacing step forward. They were leaving the wretched battlefield if she liked it or not. It did not matter to him, not now. Not when she had done so much to work against them. 

“The dwarves will be slaughtered!” She insisted, tears shining openly in her eyes.

“Yes, the dwarves will die.” Thranduil said forcing his voice to be, cold and void of anything else. Void of the stinging memories stirring at the back of his mind about the battle at Menegroth and the fall of King Thingol. Cold to combat the ashy taste that always appeared whenever he was sent back to the scorched earth of Mordor, while a third of his people lay dead around him in a war they had no business being apart of. 

“Today, tomorrow, one year hence, a hundred years from now. What does it matter?” As he replied, Thranduil slowly stalked forward, “They are mortal.” 

Tauriel stood still without reaction before suddenly she drew her bow with deadly accuracy, voice near dripping with disgust and disdain, “You think your life is worth more than theirs? When there is no love in it? No love in you!” 

Quick as a whip Thranduil lashed out, cutting Tauriel's bow in half. Like a wave of heat from a fire, he was certain that Avaleain would be able to feel the burning rager the words had kindled inside him. Fueled to be even stronger as the anger struggled to cover up the wound to his soul the words would create. 

The mere thought that Tauriel would dare say such a thing to him with such purpose and sincerity almost made Thranduil sick. He had always done his best to fill Tauriel’s years with love, patience, understanding, and encouragement to guide her through life.To make her feel that she was still loved and protected at all times, with or without a family by blood. Had he really done that badly?

He would have killed for Merenth, his wife. He would have killed anybody for her, he would have died any death for her. Sold his soul to any fate. Thranduil did not see that same unwavering love in Tauriel's eyes. How dare she compare the haunting hole of ice he had endured in his soul for centuries since the death of his queen to this fleeting obsession with another good cause. 

Even at this moment Thranduil could also not help but think about Legolas and Avaleina, and how they practically glowed when they were around one another, their laughter flowing like rivers. But also about the endless sacrifices they had made for eachother and the sacrifices made to their love as both continued to focus wholeheartedly on the war and their cause. 

“What do you know of love?” Thranduil spat, “What you feel for that dwarf is not real! You think it is love? Are you ready to die for it?” 

Since, apparently, she was ready to kill for it. Kill her own king for it.

Tauriel had to learn she could not say whatever she wanted, whenever she wanted to. 

Legolas appeared out of nowhere, and Thranduil could sense that it was because of the threat to his father. He yanked Tauriel away from all the other elves and up the path so hard that she nearly fell over backwards while he also took his knife and pushed Thranduil's sword back from her throat.

Legolas gave his father a sympathetic glance and reached out with his soul to pass love and hope for his safety. Tinged with disappointment that Avaleina was not among the band that had regrouped to their king, but to Tauriel he said, “I will go to Ravenhill with you.” 

Thranduil suspected it was only to get Tauriel away from the reactions of those who had just witnessed this event, but he couldn't help but feel even more heartbroken as Legolas followed Tauriel to Ravenhill.

But he could not stop moving, he had to keep leading. There were others to save, even while his mind wandered to Legolas and the others that were dear to his heart lost somewhere dead or alive amongst the battle. 

He hated that the relief of seeing Tauriel alive still outweighed the rage and hurt from the interaction that had unfolded right after it. 

With every street they passed new faces of his dead people were burned into his mind, and he internally prepared himself to add every single name to his list of the fallen of his kingdom. 

“My lord!” 

A voice called, and Thranduil turned towards it. Finding a young soldier whose name he did not know standing at the entrance of a sidestreet, he looked beyond and into the street. Avaleina knelt on the ground with a human boy laid on her legs and in one arm. 

Thranduil had to force himself not to close his eyes in defeat, disgust, and heartbreak at the wound in the child's abdomen. 

Avaleina showed absolutny no indication that she had heard them, while the boy continued to take shallow, terrified, dying breaths. But one’s that seemed like they would draw his end out to be a long, lonely, and painful one. 

Until Ava leaned down and kissed the boy's head and laid her forehead on his while she began to sing a song to ask for peace and comfort, while her knife kissed his neck. 

Every elf stood with absolute stillness as they felt Mandos come and go for the soul of the boy, no doubt to bring him to the rest of his family. Carefully Avaleina laid his body back on the ground, tucking both of his arms around a mangled teddy bear. 

Then she did nothing. 

Thranduil went forward with slow steps and crouched down next to her and gently took the small blade out of her trembling hand. “You did what you could,” he told Avaleina with soft sincerity, “You showed them more love than the world ever did.” 

Avaleina couldn’t seem to be able to bring herself to speak, the devastation around her was too much to add any noise to it. Thranduil understood that. 

“Come now,” With a firm yet gentle hand on one elbow and an arm around her back to grasp the other elbow he helped her to stand up. Helped being a strong term, he might as well have lifted her entire weight himself. 

That was alright, he would have done almost anything to help her at this moment. 

“Just like you” Avaleina said, distracted, like she hadn’t actually meant to say it out loud. Eyes staring at the blood that covered her hands. 

Thranduil held his hand out for water and it appeared immediately, and he poured a little over her hands and began to rub them clean with his own. Mindfully washing the blood from between each finger, “Just like me, what?” 

“You’ve always shown me more love than the world ever has.” She snorted with empty humor and empty eyes, “Probably more than the world ever will.” 

It was willpower alone that kept him from crying at that moment, especially with Tauriel's words still ringing in his heart and bones, “And I always will.” 

**0.0.0.0.0.0.0.0.0.0.0.**

Tauriel felt the ice cold disdain crawl over her before she heard Avaleina’s words, “Take her weapons, all of them. Bind her arms, bind her feet if it suits you. If she resists, I’ll break one of her bones.” 

Avaleina prowled into her peripheral vision as Tauriel felt King Thranduil depart in search of Legolas. Even through the pain of losing Kili she still felt the guilt of not being able to tell the fate of Prince Legolas. 

Thranduil had not even reacted when she had told him she had no idea where Legolas had gone, nor what his fate was. At the current time it was a relief, but the back of her mind whispered that this could only mean forthcoming problems. 

She didn’t care. There wasn't any part left alive enough to care. 

Roughly her weapons were taken and she was searched, coarse and charmed rope for strength bound her hands together. Tauriel allowed it all without a single reaction. 

Even in the seemingly rough condition that Avaleina was in - including a somewhat steady stream of blood trickling behind her ear from a mysterious source on her scalp and another concealed injury(s) somewhere on her abdomen that kept her shirt plaster to her body like it was wet from rain - the menacing presence emmenating off of her would have been enough to give any creature pause. 

Her expression would have turned many to stone, dust, or melt them like ice in the sun. The only thing more intimidating was the fact that all nearby plants, weeds, or dried things began to quake from touching the raw parts of Avaleina’s Fae. The words lingering within her mouth were bound to be sharper than any swords within a hundred miles.

Tauriel knew it was a miracle she was left standing at all just from coming face to face with her Captain. 

With tears still leaking from her eyes Tauriel asked, “Is it really necessary to bind me?”

Could they at least not spare this one dignity at a time like this? 

“Necessary?” Avaleina sneered a laugh colder and more crushing than a glacier, “On top of being an over emotional child determined to say and do whatever she wants, regardless of what it does or who it hurts because she is so incredibly self involved that she cannot see past her own eyelashes, are you also now delusional?” 

Avaleina cut her eyes around every aspect of Tauriel, “I’m waiting for a response, kinslayer.” 

Tauriel could almost feel the hatred in her own eyes sizzle the tears that insisted on continuing to leak out of her eyes, “Delusional for talking to a dwarf? The only soul that took genuine interest in me for once-” 

“The world must be so small from your view,” Avaleina said, “To think that after everything that has happened, I could possibly, ever, be even thinking about that dwarf and especially speaking of him.” 

“What then?” Tauriel snapped, “If you are going to cut out my tongue, then cut out my tongue. Take my eyes, my hands, my feet for all I care. Whatever it takes to make you go away.”

Quicker than even elves had a right to be, Avaleina had drawn her bow and held the tip of the arrow so close to her nose Tauriel felt it tickle, “You are a vile excuse for even a worm. You claim to have spent the entire 600 years of your life dedicated to your king, your kingdom, and our cause but it only took one dwarf and seventy two hours for you to pull a bow and threaten death upon your own king? In front of the very same elves you trained with, while the others lay dead and bleeding at your feet. I should take your eyes and your tongue.”

The bow creaked ominously but Avaleina’s voice was as strong as ever, “You disgusting, short minded, sad excuse for a Captain of the Guard. How dare you stand on this earth, the one you only exist on because of the love and generosity of your king who you had the absolute audacity to call heartless. How dare you draw a weapon upon any elf in creation with intent to kill at all, exactly like the sons of Feanor, but especially not the elf who adopted you in law and in heart that has already faced that exact hardship and trauma.”

“You’re heartless. You’re a void of empty wanting. Something only matters to you as far as it can serve you. Are restraints necessary?” The arrow head pressed harder against the tip of Tauriel's nose, “You tell me. You were seen spending hours whispering with a dwarvish prisoner who somehow escaped hours later, at which time you promptly abandoned your post with some sort of lie about hunting orcs. Abandoning your only prince the very moment you find these orcs in lake town in favor of the same dwarf you were whispering with, only to hardly participate in the same battle you claim Thranduil of being heartless for wanting to protect the few of us who were left from falling into the halls.” 

As quick as it caim the arrow removed its pressure, but Avaleina did not back up and the sense of immediate threat lining the air did not lessen in the slightest. “After threatening the king, you vanish again with the prince, only to be found weeping next to the dwarf with no possible guess about the whereabouts or wellbeing of Legolas? Couldn't kill the king so you settled for the prince? Sounds like a traitor to me. ” 

“I would never kill Legolas!” Tauriel gasped, somehow the surety in Avaleina’s voice saying that once sentence had cut her soul, “You don’t understand love either, you’ve let it drain out of you like a bucket with a hole. You cannot possibly understand what it’s like to know that somebody is in mortal danger-” 

Even just saying the words brought another painful lump to her throat and a fresh set of tears. 

“Stop acting like you are the only creature in the world that has ever experienced an emotion! Stop acting like nobody else has never, not once, felt love-” Avaleina almost shouted.

Tauriel definitely shouted a response, “Who are you to say anything about being in love? Who are you to claim to understand?” 

“Who am I?” It was not until after the look bloomed in Avaleina’s eye that Tauriel realized whatever she had shown before had only been a small taste of the absolute raw emotion boiling inside her. Now, not even the plants dare move. Nor the wind blow. Nothing would dare show such disrespect at this moment. 

“I am someone who has been so deeply in love for so long I made myself stop counting because all it did was make my hands go numb with the pain of the absence of it. I am someone who tried day and night to convince myself it was not love, and found disappear when I realized it could be nothing else.” 

The only thing moving now was the slight trembling in Avaleina’s voice, “You think you are the only one to experience love? Tell me how you feel after you have spent an entire night crying and asking Yavanna to take it away until you are so hoarse no sound comes out because the fear of it and the longing for it hurts more than anything else you have ever felt.” 

Somehow Avaleina’s eyes had not lost a single ray of their intensity, “Tell me how it feels to eventually collapse wearily into the love and his arms anyways, only to be constantly ripped apart and away from it against any control of yours. Tell me how it feels to scrounge only seconds or minutes of entire months together, for years, and just hoping one day that it might change.”

The pressure rolling off of Avaleina was officially a physical and tangible force in the world, the magic within her was crashing against her like ocean waves of scalding disapproval. Tauriel could taste absolute distrust, disappointment, and white rage.

“What you call love is nothing more than just another one of your fleeting obsessions, something you’re so excited and invested in while knowing nothing about what it means and what it takes. You say are in love for a handful of days, and in that time you threw away every single goal that you have worked for. Threw away all the trust people have developed within you. That's not love.” Avaleina broke eye contact for the first time and it was to look at the chaos around them, “It's just reckless destruction. Just like you.”

Then, to the other two soldiers that Tauriel had entirely forgotten about she said, “Take her back to the camp and lock her somewhere. If she makes one false move, shoot her. None are allowed to visit or speak with her aside from myself or Lord Ferdan. Not even King Thranduil, on Lord Ferdans orders. If any of these orders are broken, I will shoot you both in her place." 

As Avaleina began to storm away Tauriel called after her, “So where was your love, then, during all of this? At home safe?” 

There was no reaction 

**0.0.0.0.0**

Tauriel didn’t look up from the patch of ground she had been staring at when Avaleian’s legs stepped onto it. The way she held her head Tauriel could not see the elleths face, only up so far as to see her hands that wore a customary single ring on her left hand. 

The rope still burned her hands from where they had tied them behind her back and around a tree when hardly louder than a whisper, but far more deadly than an avalanche Avaleina said, “He was with you.” 

As her boots began retreating Avaleina tossed her last response over her shoulder, “You got what you wanted, Tauriel. Everybody knows who you are now.” 

**0.0.0.0.0.0.0.**

The sun had long since set on their efforts to reclaim the bodies of all of their fallen kin. But that did not stop them, nothing would, not until all of them were found and returned to the woods where they belonged. Their home would be waiting for them. 

It took him near an hour searching among those who searched among their kin to find the single elf that he longed to find. The only one that had taken over his mind since he had seen his father. Especially since learning that Farlen was still alive as well. 

She must have been so numb from the past experiences or the task at hand that she did not even sense that it was him. Though normally she could find him from miles away in her subconscious without even a knowing attempt. 

Legolas’ suspicion seemed to be proved correct because when Avaleina’ turned to see who approached she gasped. And then stood there near still as a statue. 

Undeterred by this lack of respne, Legolas slowly walked closer to her until he could bend down and wrap his arms firmly around her waist and lift her with a tight embrace. Out of what might have been an automatic response, Avaleina’s arms wrapped around his neck, leaving space only big enough for her face to fight also. 

Only second ago, his arms seemed too heavy to lift themselves but holding Avaleina made even his own arms feel lighter. 

He guessed that she had started crying even before he heard in her voice as she said, “You are single handed one of the stupidest people I have ever met. And when I say you can’t trust somebody, you need to listen to me. Because both of you almost died today because of her. I can’t lose both-” 

He wasn't confident she would have even been able to finish the sentence before he interrupted with a few soothing, ‘Shhhhhhh’s and ‘its okay, we’re both still here’ and ‘I’m here, I’m always here.’” 

“You’re so stuped.” She managed again, the exhaustion from every hour of the last four days seeming to steep into her voice rather than tears or anger, “I don’t how I love you so much.” 

Legolas just held her tighter and slowly began making his way back toward the main camp where he could find somewhere for her to rest. As he would have done had he not also be ordered to do so by his father. 

“I have no idea, but I do know that I am the luckiest elf on all of Arda that you do.” 

After a silent moment or two, Avaleona mumbled, “I’m still pretty sure I’m going to stab Tauriel in the eyes.” 

“How about a leg instead?”

**0.0.0.0.0.0.0.**

She had been trapped in her room for longer than two weeks, waiting to see what would become of her. The shame of what she did building with each passing hour until it began crushing her alive. 

That had been on day two. 

Perhaps it might not have felt so crushing had she been put in a cell like she had expected, rather than her room. Because she knew the only reason she was in her room to begin with would be on Thranduil’s orders. 

Even after everything she had said to him. Everything she did. 

The last thing anybody had said to her was Farlen when he answered, “Until they decide what to do with you,” to her question of her long she would be locked in here. As far as she could tell that had been two weeks ago. 

When finally a knock came upon her door, she called for whoever it was to enter. Unsure if she had any right to hope that it was Thranduil or not. 

It wasn’t. It was Captain Avaleina and Lord Ferdan. Even after two weeks since the battle large parts of Avaleina’s face and upper chest seemed to be bruies., Tauriel tired not to look. Nor jump to her feet too quickly. 

She waited until spoken to. 

For the first time Tauriel had ever heard of, the expressions of somebody else in the room was more terrifying than an upset Lord Ferdan. 

“I have never, not once, been more horribly disappointed in somebody I have trained or served with in all my life,” Ferdan stated, matter of factly. “You should beg at your kings feet in thanks and for forgiveness for not being banished. And frankly, considering the circumstances, for your life. ” 

The tone of his voice nearly made Tauriel ill, “Thankfully you are not my problem anymore. You have been discharged from any military position and you are forbidden from carrying any weapon for at least one hurdered years unless specifically told otherwise. Do you understand?” 

“Yes, Lord Ferdan.” Tauriel managed to say while choking on every new reality of her life. Which crashed into the events from the last three weeks she had not yet managed to swallow. 

“You are not to leave the grounds without an escort or specific permission. This ban binds you for one hundred years, at which time you may appeal it to the council of Elders. Is that understood?” 

“Yes, Lord Ferdan.” 

With one last sneered and scaling look, Lord Ferdan left the room leaving only a snap from the door behind him. 

The only thing left in the room with Taurle was her obsessive thoughts of how she was ever going to make this up to Thranduil. Nothing else matter until that matter was resolved. Nothing. 

Not even to regain status. Not to have her ban lifted, nor to ease her own heart. But to try and do everything she could to undo the damage the might of done to him. 

**0.0.0.0.0.**

**Thank you soooooooooooooooo much for reading!!!!! I hope you liked it!!!!! I'm so excited to hear the thoughts on this!**


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